Aeidan

I wrote this for my third song assignment in the School of Worship that I'm doing. The restrictions were that I needed to be a love song and a story song. I'm not really sure where this came from, other than it had to have come from God because I was so surprised by what came out of me. Honestly, I cried quite a few times while writing it. 

It was inspired by the testimony of my friend Josh. But some of the emotion comes from walking with some of my other friends who have gone through similar circumstances. I hope you are moved by it. I would really appreciate feedback and comments if you have any. Today we presented out third songs to our class and I recorded my band playing this song. I hope to record it in studio in two weeks time. 

Verse 1:

He heard the news, can it be true?

He's just turned eighteen and she's sixteen

At first fear is overwhelming 

But then his heart starts yearning

Maybe he can be to this child

The father he never had

He can lovingly provide 

Be a perfect dad

Hope grows, life shows 

But his future changes with signs of danger

Chorus 1:

So he sings 

"Son I'm here I won't give up on you 

My love for you is forever true

Son I'm here I won't give up on you 

My love for you is forever true"

Verse 2:

Heartache, heartbreak 

At those awful words 

A life song so beautiful 

Never will be heard

Too soon he enters the world

But never utters a cry

Cradled in his daddy's arms 

Their hello is their goodbye

Hope fades, life wanes 

The future's bleak, incomplete

Chorus 2:

Still he sings 

"Son I'm here I won't give up on you 

My love for you is forever true 

I lay you in the arms of God

You'll be safe there, but     

Goodbye is still so hard"

Outro:

"Aeidan I love you so much, 
every day my heart aches 

I didn't get to watch you grow 
or take your first steps

How I long for that day 
when we'll meet face to face 

I'll run to you, arms open wide 
for our eternal embrace"

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So far so good :)

It's been two weeks, but it feels like so much longer than that! Being back at YWAM Denver is so amazing and I'm really really enjoying it so far. At first a I was a little nervous about coming back, because I knew that a lot would be different from my last time here in 2007, and also because of how much I have changed and grown since then. But it's only been a week and I already feel like I've known everyone for a few months and my room mates totally feel like family! It is especially awesome having Paul here and, even though we don't get to hang out that often, it's just great having him nearby and seeing the way that God is working in his life. 

Paul at the lake near the YWAM base. The YWAM base is directly behind him in the distance.

There are just five of us in my school, Community Development for Missions (CDFM). We are a really nice mix: Dante is our only guy and he is from the Bahamas. He is going to MIT in September to study Chemical Engineering. Kourtney is from Viginia and she went on her DTS outreach to South Africa and volunteered in Haiti for 9 months after the earthquake. She wants to study nursing after this school. Sarah G is a Missionary Kid who lived in Thailand and Burma for 4 years. She is now studying Renuable Energy for International Development in the States and taking a semester break to do this course. And finally there's Crissy who is originally from Colorado but has travelled a lot and is passionate about helping women caught in trafficking and prostitution.

My CDFM class: Crissy, Sarah G, Angie (staff), Keri (director), Jonathan, Kourtney, me, Jenna (staff and my small group leader), Dante and Kai (assistant director)

Our leaders are also really awesome people. Keri is originally from the UK and he has his Masters in Mechanical Engineering with a specialision in Community Development. His wife, Angie, is a nurse and they both have a huge heart for missions. They also have a really adorable 2 year old son called Jonathan who I am very quickly falling in love with, and another baby on the way :)

Angie and Jonathan

Last week we spent most of the time bonding and getting to know each other. We also went over the basic introductory things about being in YWAM and rules of the base etc. This week we are doing a video conference with a lady called Christine from the YWAM base in Khona, Hawaii. There have been quite a few issues with the technology, but they got stored out by Tuesday. 

The road outside the YWAM base, very often full of geese!

Thankfully God is able to work regardless and I have learnt so much about the lies that hold back cultures and societies and how we need to go to the root of these beliefs in order to bring about change, rather than just trying to bring change on higher level without looking at the reason for the lack of development in the area. Because so often the reason for the community being in that situation is rooted in a lie that they or someone else believes about them and until that lie has been replaced by God's truth. For example that we are ALL made in God's image and that he has given us dominion over the earth and we are not controlled by it. Through this truth God can bring about lasting change. I'm really looking forward to what else I am going to learn this week and I'm really excited for the rest of this training school!

The YWAM base covered in a fresh layer of snow :)

The weekly outreach that I'm involved in with the rest of my CDFM class is teaching English to Karen refugees from Burma who are now living in the States. We had EFL training on Sunday which was pretty interesting. Monday was our first outreach and I got to take the two hyper 10 year old twin boys, who were distracting the class, aside and teach them Maths, which I thoroughly enjoyed! They are such characters! I'm really looking forward to going back and working with them every week.

Ahtim and Ahtow

Unconditional Love From Our Father

Justine and me

My church is running a Holiday Bible Club at the moment for kids in our community, and I've got the privilege of being a prayer partner for one of my bestest friends, Justine. Tonight we had a worship and prayer evening at the church and I am so grateful that I got to be a part of it. After about 45 mins of soaking in God's presence and receiving his love and loving him back while singing in worship to him, the team headed to the hall to spend some intimate time with God. I was so blessed to be able to play the piano and sing while Andrea led, and to have the opportunity to listen to God and pray blessings into and over the lives of the team members. The work that they are doing, loving the children, is so incredibly valuable!

One of the prayer stations tonight involved a time where the team members could read "The Father's Love Letter". This particularly caught my attention because we are planning on using this same love letter during our missions trip to Mthatha next week. I'm heading up the teenage girls ministry time. Part of our main vision is to show these girls that they have value and purpose and that they are not just sex objects. Our contact in the area said that nearly all of these girls have been raped and many would have had multiple abortions. I can't begin to image the trauma that they have been through! Who am I, coming from a loving and protective family in a safe suburb, to say anything to them about things such as sex, abortion, healthy eating and the value that God sees in their lives; the beauty that he created in them, despite all that may have happened to them?

Rebekah and me with some of the teenagers we worked with last year in Mthatha

What I do know about, however, is the love of God. And thus, the main thing we want to show these girls is God's heart of love for them. The absolute last thing that we want to do is bring more pain into these girls lives! No judgement, condemnation or shame. Just love. God's unconditional love. The love of a Father who has cried with them through every moment of pain in their lives. Every thing that has hurt them has hurt him too. I so badly want to show them that they ARE valuable. The DO matter. They ARE princesses and loved by the king of KINGS.

After my last post about the love letter that God wrote through me, I got a comment from a friend of mine who I have seen in a few years saying "I understand where you come from however it is far too lovey mushy dushy for me. I suppose we must be glad that God is many things, thus different for each of us." While I do agree that at times God can reveal himself differently to each of us, in accordance with what we're going through, the fundamentals of who God is NEVER changes. God IS love. And his love is for ALL of us. We just need to be willing to let him love us. How can it be love if it is forced on us? He lets us choose it. Below is the Father's Love Letter, an intimate message from God to you. And I really believe this is 100% true for every single person in the whole world. 

My Child,

You may not know me,
but I know everything about you. 
Psalm 139:1

I know when you sit down and when you rise up. 
Psalm 139:2

I am familiar with all your ways. 
Psalm 139:3

Even the very hairs on your head are numbered. 
Matthew 10:29-31

For you were made in my image. 
Genesis 1:27

In me you live and move and have your being.
Acts 17:28

For you are my offspring. 
Acts 17:28

I knew you even before you were conceived. 
Jeremiah 1:4-5

I chose you when I planned creation. 
Ephesians 1:11-12

You were not a mistake, 
for all your days are written in my book. 
Psalm 139:15-16

I determined the exact time of your birth 
and where you would live. 
Acts 17:26

You are fearfully and wonderfully made. 
Psalm 139:14

I knit you together in your mother's womb. 
Psalm 139:13

And brought you forth on the day you were born. 
Psalm 71:6

I have been misrepresented 
by those who don't know me.
John 8:41-44

I am not distant and angry, 
but am the complete expression of love. 
1 John 4:16

And it is my desire to lavish my love on you. 
1 John 3:1

Simply because you are my child 
and I am your Father. 
1 John 3:1

I offer you more than your earthly father ever could. 
Matthew 7:11

For I am the perfect father. 
Matthew 5:48

Every good gift that you receive comes from my hand. 
James 1:17

For I am your provider and I meet all your needs. 
Matthew 6:31-33

My plan for your future has always been filled with hope. 
Jeremiah 29:11

Because I love you with an everlasting love. 
Jeremiah 31:3

My thoughts toward you are countless 
as the sand on the seashore.
Psalms 139:17-18

And I rejoice over you with singing. 
Zephaniah 3:17

I will never stop doing good to you. 
Jeremiah 32:40

For you are my treasured possession. 
Exodus 19:5

I desire to establish you
with all my heart and all my soul. 
Jeremiah 32:41

And I want to show you great and marvelous things. 
Jeremiah 33:3

If you seek me with all your heart, 
you will find me. 
Deuteronomy 4:29

Delight in me and I will give you 
the desires of your heart. 
Psalm 37:4

For it is I who gave you those desires. 
Philippians 2:13

I am able to do more for you 
than you could possibly imagine. 
Ephesians 3:20

For I am your greatest encourager. 
2 Thessalonians 2:16-17

I am also the Father who comforts you 
in all your troubles. 
2 Corinthians 1:3-4

When you are brokenhearted, 
I am close to you. 
Psalm 34:18

As a shepherd carries a lamb, 
I have carried you close to my heart. 
Isaiah 40:11

One day I will wipe away 
every tear from your eyes. 
Revelation 21:3-4

And I'll take away all the pain 
you have suffered on this earth.
Revelation 21:3-4

I am your Father, and I love you 
even as I love my son, Jesus.
John 17:23

For in Jesus, my love for you is revealed. 
John 17:26

He is the exact representation of my being. 
Hebrews 1:3

He came to demonstrate that I am for you, 
not against you. 
Romans 8:31

And to tell you that I am not counting your sins.
2 Corinthians 5:18-19

Jesus died so that you and I could be reconciled. 
2 Corinthians 5:18-19

His death was the ultimate expression 
of my love for you. 
1 John 4:10

I gave up everything I loved
that I might gain your love. 
Romans 8:31-32

If you receive the gift of my son Jesus, 
you receive me. 
1 John 2:23

And nothing will ever separate you 
from my love again.
Romans 8:38-39

Come home and I'll throw the biggest party 
heaven has ever seen.
Luke 15:7

I have always been Father, 
and will always be Father.
Ephesians 3:14-15

My question is…
Will you be my child? 
John 1:12-13

I am waiting for you. 
Luke 15:11-32

Love, Your Dad 

Almighty God

Father's Love Letter used by permission Father Heart Communications 

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