Fill Me Up - In Xhosa

I was recently on a missions trip to a rural village called Viedgesville, near Mthatha in the Eastern Cape of South Africa. One thing that I really wanted to do was to be able to introduce some new worship songs to the people there that were in their own language. I asked on of our translators to translate United Pursuit's song "Fill Me Up". It is simple and incredibly beautiful and powerful. Here are the lyrics in case you ever want to use it anywhere. In my church, we like to add in ethnic songs every now and again in worship because we have quite a diverse congregation so I hope that we will be able to sing it there soon. If you speak Xhosa, please let me know if the translation is accurate.

Fill me up, God 

Fill me up, God 

Fill me up, God 

Fill me up

Ndigcwalise

Ndigcwalise

Ndigcwalise

Thixo

You provide the fire

Ndinikeze umlilo

And I'll provide the sacrifice 

Ndiyakuba lidini

You provide the Spirit

Unikeza uMoya

And I will open up inside 

Ndiyakuvulela 

Love of God, overflow

'Thando lukaThixo, luyapupuma

Permeate all my soul 

Thatha konke okwam

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Final update from my time in America

I've been meaning to post this for about a week or so, but saying goodbye to everyone in America and moving back to South Africa and getting ready to leave for a missions trip in 4 hours (and it's 2am now and I should be sleeping) means that this hasn't happened till now. So, here is a newsletter that I wrote to my supporters a little over a week ago. I explain a bunch of the stuff I learnt in my time away and what I'm up to next. Enjoy :)

---------- Written on Thursday 21 June 2012 ----------

A week from today I'll be home. It's such a weird thought. I'm so excited to go home but so sad to be leaving here, it's very bittersweet. My time here has been so special and such an incredible privilege. I feel so blessed to have spent the past six months at this beautiful base under such amazing leadership. They have poured into me, taught me, encouraged me and helped me grow. I really am so grateful.

This has been such an incredibly season of growth and learning for me. God has taught me so many practical things which I'm excited to put into practice for the rest of my life. And he's also grown me so much in my identity in him and taken me deeper in my intimacy and relationship with him. He is so good and so patient and so loving. I just love him so much and I know that it can only get better from here because he only wants good things for me. I'm excited to walking forward in life with the promises that he's given me and in the anointing that he has put on me. I look forward to living out my calling, knowing that everything I do, I do in his strength and I am never in my own ability alone.

If you are interested in hearing some of the songs I've written, two of them are on my blog. With All My Heart, a worship song, can be found at http://spalser.blogspot.com/2012/04/with-all-my-heart.html. Aeidan, a love story song for my friend whose baby was miscarried, can be found at http://spalser.blogspot.com/2012/05/aeidan.html. My other two will be going up soon. I will also be posting photos on my blog from my Art Worship piece that I did last week and an explanation about my project. Once I'm home I will continue to write on my blog, so please feel free to subscribe to it. I will keep posting the things that I'm writing and creating. Just add your email address to the subscribe section on the left. If you run into any problems, please let me know.

I'm very excited about what the rest of this year has in store. I arrive home next Wednesday morning (27th) and will be leaving for Mthatha early on Saturday (30th) morning. I will be joining a mission’s trip with a team from Pinelands Baptist Church and partnering with a missions organisation there called Sondela which is part of Zema. This will be my 6th trip there and I am so excited to see all the kids and teenagers again and continue to build the relationships that God has allowed me to form over the years. We will be working primarily in the rural villages near the mission’s base, doing a Holiday Bible Club for kids, a youth ministry program and helping with practical things at the base.

One of my prayer requests for this trip is for team unity. I've missed all the initial bonding and preparation for the trip, so please pray that I will fit in well and be able to make a good contribution to the team. Language is also a big prayer need. I do know some basic Xhosa and my grammar is quite good, but my vocabulary is rather lacking. Please pray that God will give me an ability to pick up words and phrases again easily and be able to communicate well even across the language barrier. Another prayer request is for our physical safety. We will be travelling for two days to get to our ministry location and the roads aren't very safe in some places. Please also pray for our physical protection as there have been some incidences of theft in the past.

Wisdom and discernment are also a huge request. I really want know what God's heart is in every situation. So please pray that I'll be attentive and sensitive to the leading of the Holy Spirit. During my time there I will also have the privilege of leading worship, so please pray that God will help me in that and that I'll be listening carefully to his leading. Pray that I will make the most of every opportunity that God gives me and that I'm able to apply what I've learnt here at YWAM in the ministry opportunities that I have on the trip.

After the Mthatha mission trip, which is ten days long, I don't have any set plans for the rest of the year. Next year I plan on doing my Masters in Computer Science at UCT, focusing in an area called Information and Communication Technology for Socio-Economic Development (ICT4D) which basically involves using technology to help with community development. I'm very excited about this and about possibly having an opportunity to work with Learn to Earn (a Christian skill-training NGO) again as I did last year during my Masters.

In the meantime, however, I am purposefully keeping my time fairly open and unstructured so that I can do all the things that God has put on my heart to do. This will include doing quite a lot of tutoring (Maths, Science, Computers, English etc) and starting to teach Music. I'm looking at starting private piano lessons, but I'd also be open to teaching the recorder and flute. Within our church I want to volunteer a lot of time to the ministries that need me most. I see myself naturally getting involved a lot in the music ministry, training, discipleship and equipping the different musicians in our church, as well as working with the admin and communication side of things if I'm needed. In addition, I'm looking at getting involved in children or youth ministry, depending on where the biggest need is, and helping out with some of the IT stuff in our church too.

And then in my person time I want to keep as much flexible time open in my days to be able to continue to train and develop myself in various areas. This will involve studying the Bible more and making sure that I am reading good books and listening to podcasts that help me continue to grow from the place that I'm in now. I also want to make sure that I make space for creativity and song writing because that is something that I've seen myself grow in during this time but never really made space for at home. Additionally I want to ensure that I am practicing and continuing to grow in my musical skills and competency on piano, acoustic guitar, bass guitar, flute and voice; and possibly getting further lesson on guitar and voice training.

So while I'm very sad that this season of my life is coming to an end, I know that it's only beginning of what God has in store for me in my life and I want to make sure that I'm stepping into the abundant life that he has promised. And so because of that I'm really excited about coming home and stepping into God's plans for me. As I finish up my time here, please continue to pray for me. It's going to be very hard to leave after investing so much of myself here over the past six months. Tonight (Thursday 21st) we have our CD Release Concert where we play all the songs on our new album and give out copies of the CD. The album so now available online for free download here.

I am so grateful for all your support over the past six months. Your prayers have been so impactful and meaningful in my life. Thank you for lifting me up when I was struggling and for encouraging me and interceding for me. Thank you for every one of you who have supported me financially. Without you I would not be able to be here. Even the smallest contribution has meant so much to me. If you would like to continue to receive updates from me, please let me know. This will involve the ways that God is working in my life, things I need prayer for, updates from the ministries and mission involvement.

May God bless you hugely and continue to grow you in intimacy and depth of relationship with him.

Much love in Christ,

Sarah

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Free download of our album

At last I'm excited to announce that you can now download my School of Worship's album, "Twelve" for free or listen to online. My song, Aeidan, is track number 9 and I feature on 4 other songs. The most noticeable other song that I'm on is number 7, where I sing harmonies and play the flute. I also play flute on track 8 and a piano lead part of tracks 6 and 11. I hope you enjoyed it :)

https://www.noisetrade.com/ywamdenver/twelve

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Studio Recording of Aeidan

I just graduated on Friday from School of Worship at YWAM Denver. On Monday we listened to our album for the first time which was so awesome! On Thursday night we had our CD Release Party/Concert/Worship Night and it was so amazing. So many people came to support us and they all seemed to really enjoy it. During my song so many people were crying and I even heard some heart-wrenching sobbing. I'll be updating this post in a few days with the link where you can download our album for free. In the meantime, here's the official studio recording of my song: Aeidan. For more information about the inspiration for this song, check out this post.

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With All My Heart - Recording

Here's the first song that I wrote at YWAM Denver for my School of Worship. I wrote about it in this post.  I wrote this in April 2012. It was recorded on my iPhone during a live performance where I had a pretty bad cold, so I apologize for the terrible vocals! But this is the only recording I have of this song with the band, so I though that something was better than nothing. Hopefully I'll get a better recording at some stage to replace this with.

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Black, white, grey and colours

In class this week we had a time to creatively reflect on what we had been learning. The concept that I focused on was that life isn’t black and white and that there are often grey areas that we don’t have a absolute on what is right and wrong. I started off by writing the following and then painting the picture below. I’m not much of an artist, but I wanted to try anyway since that was the point of the exercise. 

It's easier to live in black and white, because it's easier to know what to do. What is right and wrong? If we lived in black and white though, there would be no colour. Life would be one dimensional. We need the grey to bring in the second and third dimensions. But then what is colour? It is not black, white or grey. It is life. It brings life. It expresses beauty and creativity and inspiration. It brings fullness to the picture and highlights things that would have otherwise been overlooked.

Colours represent God's promise, His faithfulness, His trustworthiness, His love and compassion. If we force everything to be black and white we lose so much of God's character. In fact, we lose what makes God who He is and makes Him someone that I would want to be in relationship with. We make God one dimensional too. We take away His multifaceted nature, His depth and incredibly beauty. We lose the dimension of His love and grace, His mercy. But when we allow God to paint His rainbow of life and promise back into our lives, colours are brought out from even the darkest shadows as His light allows them to reflect His goodness and His nature.

Click here to listen to my latest song!

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Aeidan

I wrote this for my third song assignment in the School of Worship that I'm doing. The restrictions were that I needed to be a love song and a story song. I'm not really sure where this came from, other than it had to have come from God because I was so surprised by what came out of me. Honestly, I cried quite a few times while writing it. 

It was inspired by the testimony of my friend Josh. But some of the emotion comes from walking with some of my other friends who have gone through similar circumstances. I hope you are moved by it. I would really appreciate feedback and comments if you have any. Today we presented out third songs to our class and I recorded my band playing this song. I hope to record it in studio in two weeks time. 

Verse 1:

He heard the news, can it be true?

He's just turned eighteen and she's sixteen

At first fear is overwhelming 

But then his heart starts yearning

Maybe he can be to this child

The father he never had

He can lovingly provide 

Be a perfect dad

Hope grows, life shows 

But his future changes with signs of danger

Chorus 1:

So he sings 

"Son I'm here I won't give up on you 

My love for you is forever true

Son I'm here I won't give up on you 

My love for you is forever true"

Verse 2:

Heartache, heartbreak 

At those awful words 

A life song so beautiful 

Never will be heard

Too soon he enters the world

But never utters a cry

Cradled in his daddy's arms 

Their hello is their goodbye

Hope fades, life wanes 

The future's bleak, incomplete

Chorus 2:

Still he sings 

"Son I'm here I won't give up on you 

My love for you is forever true 

I lay you in the arms of God

You'll be safe there, but     

Goodbye is still so hard"

Outro:

"Aeidan I love you so much, 
every day my heart aches 

I didn't get to watch you grow 
or take your first steps

How I long for that day 
when we'll meet face to face 

I'll run to you, arms open wide 
for our eternal embrace"

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Psalm 88

This is the final Psalm that I paraphrased for class this week. Earlier in the week I did Psalm 3 and Psalm 87. This is a very unique Psalm because it is one of the only ones that does not end on a 'happy' note, or with some sort of resolution. The Psalmist was going through a rough time in his faith, as evident through the kind of questions that he asks. I enjoyed putting this into my own words because it helped me identify the emotions that people who are really struggling in their faith at the moment are asking.

Psalm 88 - Various verses - Paraphrased by Sarah Palser

vs 1 God, I know that you are the only one who can save me and so I cry out to all the time. I never stop.
vs 2 Please listen! Please hear the cry of my heart!
vs 3 I can't take this anymore. It feels like my life is over. It's just too much, I can't handle it.
vs 6 Why God? I feel like you've put me in a tiny hole somewhere, too far away and hidden for you to be able to hear my cries.
vs 7 You seem so angry with me, it washes over me again and again like mighty waves, tearing me to pieces.
vs 8 You've taken everything that I hold dear away from me. I have nothing left. Everyone hates me. I'm stuck. I can't get out.
vs 9 My eyes ache from crying so much. I'm crying out to you, doing everything I can to get your attention. Where are you?
vs 13 Even though you don't seem to answer, still I cry to you for help. I have nowhere else to turn.
vs 14 But it still feels like you've rejected me. Don't you hear my prayers at all?

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Psalm 3

Yesterday I posted a paraphrased version of Psalm 87 that I wrote for a class assignment. Here is my next one that we were assigned to do, Psalm 3, that I wrote inspired by what God highlighted for me while I read it.

Psalm 3

vs 1 God, I feel like the whole world is against me. It seems like people are out to get me wherever I go.
vs 2 Everyone around me thinks You won't come through for me
vs 3 But I know You better than that, I trust You. You are my protection and my glory, You are the one allows me to lift my head high in confidence and full assurance of faith.
vs 4 All I have to do is open my mouth and speak and You hear me. Your ears are ever attentive to my cries for help.
vs 5 You watch over me through the day and night. The reason I wake up in the morning is because You are the one who sustains my body and renews my strength.
vs 6 Because of that, I have no need to be afraid, even when the world is against me, pressing me down on every side.
vs 7 I just cry "Help God! Come and rescue me! " And I know that You have power over every single one of my enemies. Make them incapable of hurting me anymore.
vs 8 I know that my deliverance is in You and that you shower me with blessings. I love You, Thank You.

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Psalm 87

We are learning about Spiritual Authority in class this week and one of our assignments was to take a Psalm each day and paraphrase it with emphasis on the things that God highlights to us. Here is my version of Psalm 87.

Psalm 87 - paraphrased by Sarah Palser

vs 1 God has founded me on His holy mountain, I am secure and safe in His love, never to be shaken.
vs 2 He loves when I walk in unity and love, when I seek and share wisdom and draw people from all walks of life to himself. He loves to live with me in every moment of the day so much more than when I try to live for Him without including Him in everything.
vs 3 God speaks good things about me, His beloved.
vs 4 He knows my name, counting me among his children and proudly says "This one is mine!"
vs 5 God will make it known to the world that I am His, He claims me as His own, letting others know that is He who establishes me.
vs 6 He writes my name in His book, so that no one can question where I belong.
vs 7 In response I will sing to God, "You alone are my fountain, the source of my life that refreshes my soul."

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How to Bless Your Heart

A Song By Sarah Palser

These are the lyrics of the second song that I wrote for my School of Worship (SOW) course that I am taking at YWAM Denver. The assignment was to write a song of any genre that was inspired by a proverb in the book of Proverbs. My inspiration comes from Proverbs 21:3 which says, "To do what is right and just is more acceptable to the Lord than sacrifice." 

This verse was very impactful to me during the Community Development for Missions (CDFM) course that I took here at YWAM Denver from January to March. Quite a few times we discussed what it means that God considers “obedience better than sacrifice”. This song was written in a meditation style that we learnt about in the first week of teaching of SOW, where you have a dialog with God about his Word and in response to what he says in his Word. So this song sort of reflects the journey that God has taken me on over the past 4 months.

This is a photo of my friend Mats and I preparing to play our flute together on the streets of Downtown Denver

Verse 1:
How I long to bless your heart
With my soul, mind and voice
But what do I have to offer you
That will make your heart rejoice?

I want to love you in such a way
That will let you really know
The extent of my devotion to you
But how can I make it show?

Chorus:
I'll bless your heart above all else
If I do what's just, do what's right
To you O Lord, my obedience
Means more than a sacrifice

Verse 2:
How can I know what's good and just
So I can do what's right?
I need to really know you Lord
To do what's pleasing in your sight 

And so I choose to seek your face
I choose to walk in your ways.
I resolve to go forever deeper
With you, all my days 

Bridge:
So I come
I no longer hide
Lay my cares aside
My worries and my pride

I come
You are all I see
It's only you and me
True intimacy


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Stepping into God's Anointing

It never ceases to amaze me how fast time flies! It’s already the start of my 5^th week in School of Worship (SOW). I have so much that I could write, because God has been doing so much in my life and stretching me and growing me and challenging me in so many ways, but I’ll try keep this brief. I will try to write extra posts about some of the other things I’m not able to go into detail about in this update. If there’s anything particular that you’d like to hear more about, please let me know and I’ll be sure to include it in a future update.

This is my band :)

In my last newsletter I mentioned that I have had several prophecies spoken over my life with regards God’s anointing on me for worship. I said that I didn’t feel like I had stepped into them yet and that I was hoping I would be able to during this school. Well, I definitely feel like I am! On the second Wednesday evening of the school I assisted my friend Bronson in leading a time of soaking worship for 1.5 hours. It was a really amazing time of being in God’s presence. I stepped out and sang songs in the Spirit and was playing only for Jesus, not worrying much about the other people in the room. In that moment when I started to sing out the prophetic words that God put on my heart I felt His pleasure wash over me and my hands started to tingle and ‘burn’ with the same feeling that I felt when I first felt His anointing rest on me. It was so amazing to get such a tangible feeling of His delight and His affirmation of me taking a step in the direction in which He has called me. And I know that is only the beginning of what He has in store for me. There have been a number of other times where I’ve stepped out in obedience and in love and I’ve felt His delight on me.

Bonding time in Boulder

I really feel that I am exactly where God wants me to be and it’s such an amazing feeling! While it isn’t the easiest thing to be away from Paul during this season, I couldn’t think of a better season of my life to be able to wholeheartedly seek the Lord with no distractions. He is teaching me so much about intimacy with Him and being able to find my satisfaction and fulfilment in Him alone. I feel like God is drawing me into a much deeper place of intimacy with Him and helping me grow in my character and integrity as a result. In class last week we learnt about the Tabernacle of David and I was blown away by the life of David, looking at it from a completely new light. God brought new revelation to me about the importance of David’s intimacy with God which allowed him to live in a freedom that most of the people in the Old Testament never got to experience, because he understood God’s grace and mercy, and knew Him so deeply. It’s so freeing to know that while I do have a lot of responsibilities as a worship leader; my primary focus need only be on intimacy with God. The overflow of that will be a life that pleases God in every way, including in my leadership.

While this school is probably fuller than my Community Development course time wise, it feels so much less stressful to me! I absolutely love all the hours each day where I’m able to practice, play and write music/poetry. Our two hour band sessions each afternoon are definitely one of my highlights. I realised that I have never before had a season of my life where I was surrounded by so many creative people. It’s so inspiring being around these people and they bring out the creative side in me that I realise I have suppressed for a lot of my life. I love the freedom to express myself in new ways and being challenged to step out of my comfort zone and try new things too.

These are the girls from my band: me, Brooklyn and Maddy

Today our second official song is due. The specifications for our first song was that it needed to be a corporate worship song that could fit in at our home church and represent the place that we wanted our church to be in a few years time. I put the lyrics on my blog here. The inspiration for our second song needed to come from Proverbs. I chose Proverbs 21:3 and wrote a meditation to God about my desire to bless His heart and how I could do that in light of what He says in that Proverb. I’ll put the lyrics up here soon. During Week 3 our teaching was specifically on Songwriting and during that week we were given a number of writing assignments. I turned one of the poems I wrote into a short song and I put a recording of it on this post and on YouTube. I also have a few other poems and reflections on my blog that you can read if you’re interested.

Another huge learning area for me is in my skills on various musical instruments. During the first week God asked me to surrender my entitlement to play the piano to Him. I have been playing the piano for the past 15 years and I thought that I was coming here mainly to play piano. But in fact I’ve been doing very little piano playing in the band at all! More often I’m singing lead or harmonies, playing the flute or even playing the bass guitar! I’m getting one-on-one acoustic guitar lessons each week and practice for at least 30 mins each day. My teacher is a really amazing guitarist and man of God and it’s such a privilege to learn from him. After just three short lessons I feel like I have a much better understanding of the guitar and I have left my lessons with my head hurting from all the amazing new things I’ve been learning! So while it is a little different to not be playing much of my ‘main’ instrument, God has shown me that this is a season for me to grow in areas that I’m not that strong. From this I’ll become a more skilled musician overall and thus more equipped to lead worship in a way that glorifies God and write songs that allow people to really enter into God’s presence.

My band again - after a bonding time at the park :)

In closing, I am having the time of my life and really enjoying every moment of this season, even the really hard times. I think I cry on a near daily basis, sometimes multiple times a day! So while I am being stretched, I am also being refined and I know that God is doing something very special in my life during this time. I can’t wait to see what He has in store for me over the next eight weeks! Thank you so much for partnering with me during this very amazing time of my life. I really value your love and prayers so much; they carry me through the challenging times. I also really appreciate all those of you who have supported me financially, as I would not be able to be here without you. May God pour out His blessing and favour on you and may you experience intimacy with Him on a whole new level today and continuing deeper forever.

Much love in Christ,        Sarah

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With All My Heart

Here are the lyrics for the first full song that I wrote for my School of Worship course that I'm taking. 

Verse 1:
You're stirring in my heart
A desire for your love 
Come wash over me again 
Cover me with peace from above 

Verse 2:

Fill me with a passion

To live a life of praise 

From the depth of my soul God

I'll sing to you all my days 

Chorus:

With all my heart and all my soul

Lord I want to bring you joy

In every moment of each day

God I long to bring you praise

Verse 3:

Everything I do

And everything I say

Let it be all for you Lord

You can have your way

Bridge:

My heart is yours and yours alone

My life is yours for your glory Lord

Let my soul sing your praise

Now, forever and always

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Pale Blue Dot

One of my assignments during my songwriting class last week was to look at this photo called "Pale Blue Dot" which was taken of Earth from the Voyager 1 in 1990, near Pluto - 3.8 billion miles away. Earth is the tiny dot in the yellow sunbeam. We were asked to write 6 words expressing the image.

tiny

overlooked

perfection

the Created Earth

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Out of a place of intimacy

Today was our first day of class on the Tabernacle of David in School of Worship. At the end of class we were asked to spend some time reflecting on what stood out to us and how it applies to us as worship leaders. Here are my thoughts:

The thing that has stood out to me the most from class today is the freedom that I should feel in Christ, even in the midst of my calling. Yes, there is a lot of responsibility on me as a worship leader, as I am called to usher people into the presence of God, but I'm not able to do it in my own strength, so I shouldn't stress about it and try do it by myself. Leading people into God's presence and living a life that glorifies him will be a natural outflowing of a life of intimacy with him.

David was called a man after God's own heart, not because he lived a perfect life, but because he sought after God, even in the darkest times of his life. He was willing to admit to his shortcomings and surrender them to God and ask God to make him new and forgive him. He had great intimacy with God and because of that God used him to lead the entire nation into true worship of him, and used his kingdom as an example of what the kingdom of heaven looks like. 

I just find so much freedom in this example of the life of David and the intimacy that he had with God. Out of that, everything else was birthed. The only thing I need to concern myself with is focusing on staying in a place of intimacy with God and out of that everything else will flow. We learnt in class today that intimacy with God allows us to proclaim the truth about God as we get to know him better and through our proclamation God brings fresh revelation into our lives. This revelation takes us into a deeper place of intimacy with God. And so the cycle continues. But it all starts with me choosing a life of intimacy with God and guarding that as the most important thing in the world to me. 

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Deafening Silence - short song assignment

Here is another song writing assignment that I did for my School of Worship class this week. We were given 20 minutes in class to write the lyrics and then could take some time in the evening to put it to music if we wanted. 

The assignment was to take one of five oxymorons and use it either in or to inspire a song. I chose 'deafening silence'. My inspiration for this song came from Elijah's expereince with God on the mountain in 1 Kings 19:11-13. 


I did a short recording of it on my iPhone and made it into a video so that I could put it on here. The sound quality isn't great, but at least you can get the just of how I want it to sound :)

Verse 1:
I want to hear Your voice
I want to see Your face
I want to feel Your presence
Here in this place


Verse 2:
But You're not in the wind
You're not in the quake
Nor are You in the fire
Though they seem so great


Chorus:
I stand on this mountain top
Humbled and in awe
Surrounded by Deafening Silence
It's You
            and I adore
I adore


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Metaphor - song writing assignment

In class this week we’re learning about song writing. We have incredibly teachers, Caleb and Erin, who are really great musicians. One of our assignments from Monday was to choose a metaphor from Isaiah 25 or 26 and explore it poetically.

I chose the metaphor from Isaiah 25:4 which says,
“You have been a refuge for the poor, a refuge for the needy in their distress, a shelter from the storm and a shade from the heat.”

You are a refuge in my need

A safe place for me to hide

You keep me sheltered in the storm

Protecting me from raging tides

In my distress I run to you

Guard me from the blazing heat

That burns and bickers in my soul

Leaving no room for retreat

Your love is like a cooling balm

A shelter in times of trouble

You, Lord, make the waters calm

Rebuilding my heart from rubble

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Whatever Happened To Worship?

- A Call to True Worship - By A. W. Tozer

Book report by Sarah Palser for School of Worship

Whatever Happened to Worship was compiled from a sermon series that A. W. Tozer preached in the 1960s shortly before His death. Even though it was written 50 years ago, Tozer’s thoughts are still very relevant to the struggles that the Christian church faces with worship today. The book starts by looking at worship in the church, where people often feel like they are rich and lack nothing. But what is really lacking is a true, unadulterated worship of God. We were not created to obey a set of laws, but to worship God and enjoy Him forever. He does not need our worship, be He loves it. Sadly it is often the case that those who lead in the church are not those who pray, seek God and spend time adoring Him together. This is something that I have witnessed in my own church and it is a tragedy indeed that breaks God’s heart.

Tozer then goes on to say that true worship demands new birth. We need to have a biblical understanding of who God really is and how He wants to worship in order to really worship Him. “True worship of God must be a constant and consistent attitude or state of mind within the believer.” (page 24) It is birthed through our understanding of who He is. We please Him most when we stop trying to make ourselves perfect but give ourselves wholly to Him, knowing that He understands and loves us completely. And this comes through a correct understanding of the fear of the Lord.

We often call things ‘worship’ that are not actually true worship. God loves it when we worship and we need to ask Him how He wants to be worshipped. This was a new insight to me which has challenged the way that I view worship. I have always worshipped God in the ways in which I have been taught, or in the way that I like to worship, without considering that God may have a particular way in which He wants to be worshiped. I want to apply this to my life by seeking God and asking Him how He wants me to worship Him. Tozer also pointed out the importance of worshipping in both Spirit and Truth. One without the other would not be adequate. We need both to really bring pleasure to God’s heart.

We were born to worship God. It is a tragedy that many people never come to this understanding. We need to focus on teaching people the true reason for their existence. Jesus walked on earth to reflect God’s glory and we were created to do the same. Tozer ponders that when people lose God they spend their time trying to find something else to worship. It is a tragedy that while humans were made more like God than any other creature, most now reflect His glory less than the rest of creation.

Tozer next discusses the fact that we cannot find God by our own intellect. If we could, we would be equal to Him. Instead, we are awed by the presence of God and drawn to Him by His revelation to us of who He is. Tozer defines worship as “to feel with the heart”. For us to worship in Spirit and Truth we need to feel wonder and experience the mystery of God.

The church, Tozer says, exists to do corporately what each Christian should be doing individually – to worship God. The church fails God when it fails to allow people to truly worship Him together. When we align ourselves with Him again, His Spirit will realign the church with the Word of God. I really like this quote: “There is no limit to what God can do through us if we are His yielded and purified people, worshipping and showing forth His glory and His faithfulness.” (page 101) We often limit the way that God can use us and how effective we can be by not yielding to Him and worshipping Him wholeheartedly. What power there is when we live out what we were created to do!

It is not the exception that Christians worship God in Spirit and in Truth, Tozer states, but rather that is what a normal Christian does. Those who do not cannot be considered normal Christians. We have become a generation that has lost sight of the sacredness of our worship. To really know God is to love and worship Him. They cannot be separated. Our worship is not something that happens only on Sundays, but is something that should be lived out every moment of each day. “If you cannot worship the Lord in the midst of your responsibilities on Monday, it is not very likely that you were worshipping on Sunday!” (page 122) This is something that I need to be constantly reminded of in order to make sure that my whole life is lived as an expression of worship to God. This cannot be done if I have not fully surrendered every aspect of my life to God and if I am holding on to things that I know are displeasing to Him. This book has challenged me with the importance of really living a life of complete surrender, one that glorifies God every moment of my day, for I was made to worship Him and that is what I want to do. 

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A dream becoming a reality after 7 years :)

Dear Prayer Supports, Friends and Family

On Friday I graduated from my Community Development for Missions school. I was asked to give a speech during the graduation ceremony to sum up my experience in the school and to share a bit of what God did in us and through us. I put up my speech on this blog and you to read if you are interested. I learnt so much in the school and it was very hard to try and sum it up in just a few minutes. I have also got a number of other posts on this blog which you can read if you are interested in hearing more about my time in the Community Development School. A little bragging point: I got 100% for my final project for the school I just finished! I worked very hard on my project and I'm proud of the outcome. The project was based on the community of Viedgesville that I have been to visit five times with the Pinelands Baptist Church Mthatha missions team over the years. It was exciting coming up with a development idea for a real place that I have a big heart for and I'm excited about the possibility of going there with our church the week that I return to South Africa at the end of June this year. The paper is quite long, but if you are interested in taking a look at it, let me know and I will email you a copy. 

As of Monday this week I am now a student again at YWAM Denver, doing a School of Worship (SOW) at last! It has been a seven year journey from when God first gave me a desire to do this school (in 2005), so I know without a shadow of a doubt that I am exactly where God wants me to be, doing what he wants me to be doing. I'm very excited about what I will learn this quarter and I'm looking forward to see the things that God grows in me and gets me to step out in. There are eleven students doing the SOW and only three of them are Americans! It's lovely being in such a diverse and international class! We have four Canadians, three Americans, a South Africa, an Australian, a Norwegian and a girl from Finland. Between all the students currently at the YWAM Denver base this quarter, there are at least 10 nationalities represented and I absolutely love that!

Yesterday (Monday) was registration and settling in and today (Tuesday) has been bonding and instructions about how things are run at the base. We have the afternoon off and then will be having a class party at our leaders' house tonight. This week we will be sharing testimonies and getting to hear from the base directors as well as from the pastor of the neighbouring church. I'm looking forward to finding out which band I will be in and who I will be getting to write and create music with. It's so exciting! During this quarter we are each required to write and perform four original songs which we will further develop as a band. From these songs, a number will be selected to be recorded professionally by our class and made into a CD towards the end of the quarter. We also receive one on one training on an instrument of our choice which we want to learn or develop further in. I have chosen to do acoustic guitar because I really want to learn to play guitar better and hopefully reach the point where I will be able to lead worship on either piano or guitar. I know this will be incredibly useful, especially since there are often times where pianos aren't readily available. During this school I will also be reading three books on worship and writing book reports on them. I will be posting my reports on this blog, so if you are interested in hearing more about what I am learning, feel free to subscribe to it by entering your email address on the left hand side of my blog's page. If you need help subscribing, please let me know and I will help you. 

I'm so incredibly excited to be here doing this School of Worship! I know that God's timing is perfect and that there is a reason why he's made me wait seven years to do this school. I feel like I am much more confident in my worship leading and my ability to play in public now than I was in 2007 when I originally wanted to do the school. Over the last few years I have received several prophesies over my life about my gifting in worship and, while I do not yet feel like I am at the level that these prophecies indicated yet, I want to get to that level by being in a place like this where I can receive excellent training and equipping and being in an environment that will stretch me and grow me in my ability to worship God and lead people into his presence. 

Thank you so much for partnering with me in this adventure. I covert your prayers and I know that God uses them powerfully in my life. Thank you so much for all your love and support over the past three months and I really look forward to sharing with you what God teaches me in the coming three months. Thank you also to those of you who have contributed financially towards me being able to be here. I really love the way that God provides when I step out in faith and obedience to his calling on my life. I am very close to being debt free, but am still in need of a little more support. Please prayerfully consider whether you would be able to partner with me in this. If you feel God leading you in this way or just want to help me out, please feel free to either send money straight to Pinelands Baptist Church (for my South African supporters) or to YWAM Denver (for my American supporters) with a note saying that it is for me. I really really appreciate it. If you have any questions, please don't hesitate to contact me. 

Much love in Christ,

Sarah