Fill Me Up - In Xhosa

I was recently on a missions trip to a rural village called Viedgesville, near Mthatha in the Eastern Cape of South Africa. One thing that I really wanted to do was to be able to introduce some new worship songs to the people there that were in their own language. I asked on of our translators to translate United Pursuit's song "Fill Me Up". It is simple and incredibly beautiful and powerful. Here are the lyrics in case you ever want to use it anywhere. In my church, we like to add in ethnic songs every now and again in worship because we have quite a diverse congregation so I hope that we will be able to sing it there soon. If you speak Xhosa, please let me know if the translation is accurate.

Fill me up, God 

Fill me up, God 

Fill me up, God 

Fill me up

Ndigcwalise

Ndigcwalise

Ndigcwalise

Thixo

You provide the fire

Ndinikeze umlilo

And I'll provide the sacrifice 

Ndiyakuba lidini

You provide the Spirit

Unikeza uMoya

And I will open up inside 

Ndiyakuvulela 

Love of God, overflow

'Thando lukaThixo, luyapupuma

Permeate all my soul 

Thatha konke okwam

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With All My Heart

Here are the lyrics for the first full song that I wrote for my School of Worship course that I'm taking. 

Verse 1:
You're stirring in my heart
A desire for your love 
Come wash over me again 
Cover me with peace from above 

Verse 2:

Fill me with a passion

To live a life of praise 

From the depth of my soul God

I'll sing to you all my days 

Chorus:

With all my heart and all my soul

Lord I want to bring you joy

In every moment of each day

God I long to bring you praise

Verse 3:

Everything I do

And everything I say

Let it be all for you Lord

You can have your way

Bridge:

My heart is yours and yours alone

My life is yours for your glory Lord

Let my soul sing your praise

Now, forever and always

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Whatever Happened To Worship?

- A Call to True Worship - By A. W. Tozer

Book report by Sarah Palser for School of Worship

Whatever Happened to Worship was compiled from a sermon series that A. W. Tozer preached in the 1960s shortly before His death. Even though it was written 50 years ago, Tozer’s thoughts are still very relevant to the struggles that the Christian church faces with worship today. The book starts by looking at worship in the church, where people often feel like they are rich and lack nothing. But what is really lacking is a true, unadulterated worship of God. We were not created to obey a set of laws, but to worship God and enjoy Him forever. He does not need our worship, be He loves it. Sadly it is often the case that those who lead in the church are not those who pray, seek God and spend time adoring Him together. This is something that I have witnessed in my own church and it is a tragedy indeed that breaks God’s heart.

Tozer then goes on to say that true worship demands new birth. We need to have a biblical understanding of who God really is and how He wants to worship in order to really worship Him. “True worship of God must be a constant and consistent attitude or state of mind within the believer.” (page 24) It is birthed through our understanding of who He is. We please Him most when we stop trying to make ourselves perfect but give ourselves wholly to Him, knowing that He understands and loves us completely. And this comes through a correct understanding of the fear of the Lord.

We often call things ‘worship’ that are not actually true worship. God loves it when we worship and we need to ask Him how He wants to be worshipped. This was a new insight to me which has challenged the way that I view worship. I have always worshipped God in the ways in which I have been taught, or in the way that I like to worship, without considering that God may have a particular way in which He wants to be worshiped. I want to apply this to my life by seeking God and asking Him how He wants me to worship Him. Tozer also pointed out the importance of worshipping in both Spirit and Truth. One without the other would not be adequate. We need both to really bring pleasure to God’s heart.

We were born to worship God. It is a tragedy that many people never come to this understanding. We need to focus on teaching people the true reason for their existence. Jesus walked on earth to reflect God’s glory and we were created to do the same. Tozer ponders that when people lose God they spend their time trying to find something else to worship. It is a tragedy that while humans were made more like God than any other creature, most now reflect His glory less than the rest of creation.

Tozer next discusses the fact that we cannot find God by our own intellect. If we could, we would be equal to Him. Instead, we are awed by the presence of God and drawn to Him by His revelation to us of who He is. Tozer defines worship as “to feel with the heart”. For us to worship in Spirit and Truth we need to feel wonder and experience the mystery of God.

The church, Tozer says, exists to do corporately what each Christian should be doing individually – to worship God. The church fails God when it fails to allow people to truly worship Him together. When we align ourselves with Him again, His Spirit will realign the church with the Word of God. I really like this quote: “There is no limit to what God can do through us if we are His yielded and purified people, worshipping and showing forth His glory and His faithfulness.” (page 101) We often limit the way that God can use us and how effective we can be by not yielding to Him and worshipping Him wholeheartedly. What power there is when we live out what we were created to do!

It is not the exception that Christians worship God in Spirit and in Truth, Tozer states, but rather that is what a normal Christian does. Those who do not cannot be considered normal Christians. We have become a generation that has lost sight of the sacredness of our worship. To really know God is to love and worship Him. They cannot be separated. Our worship is not something that happens only on Sundays, but is something that should be lived out every moment of each day. “If you cannot worship the Lord in the midst of your responsibilities on Monday, it is not very likely that you were worshipping on Sunday!” (page 122) This is something that I need to be constantly reminded of in order to make sure that my whole life is lived as an expression of worship to God. This cannot be done if I have not fully surrendered every aspect of my life to God and if I am holding on to things that I know are displeasing to Him. This book has challenged me with the importance of really living a life of complete surrender, one that glorifies God every moment of my day, for I was made to worship Him and that is what I want to do. 

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Graduation Speech for CDFM

My CDFM class - students and staff: (back) Dante, Sarah G, Kai, (front) Me, Chrissy, Kourtney, Jonathan, Keri, Angie and Jenna

Honestly I didn't know what to expect of this school when I applied. I hoped I'd learn something about God's heart for the poor and how to combat poverty, but I didn't have incredibly high expectations. But within the first week of teaching God had already blown me away with a complete change in worldview and I learnt more that first week than I expected to learn in the whole school. 

And from there on the learning and amazing teaching continued. Each week brought new insight and revelation into topics that God can use in us to change the lives of people all around the world. Things like water & sanitation, healthcare, education & teaching, economics, how to start an NGO, amongst many other things. But while this school did teach us a lot of practical skills that we can use on the missions field, these would be a lot less meaningful without the Godly foundations that everything was built on and the biblical worldview through which everything was seen. 

I know I speak for my whole class when I say that I now definitely have a much better understanding of how to go into a community and be able to empower them and help them build themselves up without doing more harm than good in the process. This school has revealed to us so many misconceptions we've had about missions and the ways in which we've done things in an unsustainable and unloving way in the past, even though we thought we were doing the right thing. I feel equipped to go out and make a much more long term impact in the world now, wherever that may be. And I know that I will be able to use the principles taught in this school to bring God's Kingdom on earth as it is in heaven in every sphere of life that I may be in: whether that be in church, on the missions field, in social circles, education, IT or in business sphere. I know that God is going to use each one of us to bring about his intentions for mankind wherever he may take us in life. And I'm really excited to be a part of it. 

I would like to thank all our staff for all their input in our lives over the past three months. We really appreciate you and would not have made it through without your love and support. And thank you YWAM Denver for this amazing opportunity that you have given us. I look forward to seeing where God takes each one of us from here. 

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Last week of Community Development

I can't believe how fast time has gone. I officially have only one more week of my first school at YWAM Denver, studying Community Development for Missions (CDFM). For an overview about what I'm doing this year, check out this post. 

 

It has been a pretty challenging school, but I've learnt so much and I'm looking forward to putting it into practice at some point in the near future. I feature in this video below where I talk about a stove that I made out of tin cans! 

These photos are of the finished product :)

I think the most impactful things that I've learnt in this school were summaries really well in the book "When Helping Hurts" which I wrote a book report on here. I'd really encourage you to read it if you are interested in Missions or Community Development of any form. In Missions and Community Development we so often end up going into a community thinking that in just a few weeks or months we can 'fix' them and make them like us. Obviously most of us don't consciously think that way, but it very often ends up being the underlying attitude that the community receives during our time there. We go in and build them houses, paint their schools, plant trees, teach them about God or abstinence or about health and HIV, without taking the time to really understand their culture. 

All people are created in God's image and have incredible potential to do amazing things. On Friday night I went to a thing called the Resound: One Night Conference with Ray Hughes from Circuit Riders as the speaker. It was a really amazing time of worship and teaching. The church where the conference was held, VineLife, is situated in the middle of the country with huge windows on either side of the stage that overlooked the fields and Rocky Mountains. Instead of standing facing the band, we were encouraged to stand on the side of the stage and look out over God's creation as we worshiped Him. It was a really incredible experience to watch the sun set over such amazing beauty and try to comprehend that the God who made all of that loves ME and created me to be in relationship with him. It blew my mind and I just wept! 

One thing that Ray said that really stood out to me was that "God created everything to be creative". Such a simple yet so profound a concept! Every cell in our body recreates many times a second. All creation creates and grows with God all the time. How much more should we! I also love the concept of the universe being described as "uni" = one, "verse" = song. The universe is one song, every part of creation singing it's part in harmony. It reminds me of this mashup that Louie Giglio made of stars and whales singing together. So amazing! 

So coming back to how that applies to what I learnt in the CDFM school, God has put amazing potential and strengths and talents in each one of us and we just need to harness them. So when we go into communities where we want to help bring about change, we need to see them the same way. I've learnt that when we go into a community we need to help them recognise their own strengths and identify the potential that each other have. From this we can help to empower them to bring about the change that they want to see in their community. 


There are some really amazing stories of what has happened in communities when the local people have been empowered and have hope again to reach for their dreams and create a better life for their families. Obviously alongside this we need to help through educating the people in the areas that they want to develop in and helping them come up with sustainable solutions to their identified needs. So that may be teaching them how to build a well or a water catchment system, but not simply building it for them. The most important thing is to make sure that when we leave the community, the people are empowered to continue bringing about change and developing further from the work that has been done. 

On Tuesday and Wednesday I'm going to be sharing some of what I've learnt with the Compassion Discipleship Training School (DTS) that is running at YWAM Denver Arvada campus (Paul is doing that school) and with Boarders DTS that is running up at the Eagle Rock campus. I'm kinda nervous about it and would really appreciate some prayers. I haven't had much time to prepare yet, so I need to spend most of the next two days planning and preparing. Tomorrow (Monday) night is also the last time that our school will be working with the Koren refugees who we have been teaching English. I'm pretty sad to be leaving them because I've really enjoyed working with them, but I hope that I might be able to visit them again next when I'm doing School of Worship next quarter. But I think I'll write more about that in a different post :)

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When Helping Hurts

"How to alleviate poverty without hurting the poor... and yourself"

Book written by Steve Corbett & Brian Fikkert

This is my book report from the second book that I have read in my Community Development for Missions training school. My first book report on the book "Truth and Transformation" can be found here. 

A - What are the key themes and principles that were communicated in the book? 

When Helping Hurts was written to make people wanting to help the poor realise the ways in which they often end up hurting the poor more than they help them. It not only points out what we need to avoid in mission and community development, but also proposes alternative solutions to improve the way that we help poor people while avoiding hurting either or both parties in the process.

The first part of the book looks at the foundational concepts of helping without hurting. Herein it discusses why Jesus came to the Earth – not just to save our souls, but to restore our relationships with Him, ourselves, each other and the rest of creation. We need to remember that in every aspect of community development we want to be bringing restoration in these three areas, as Jesus did. The book then looks at the real definition of poverty from the perspective of the poorest people. The define it as being so much more than a lack of material possessions, but as a lack of dignity, value, self worth and power.

Poverty is the result of relationships that do not work. When we come in as outsiders to a poor community we need to realise that we have mutual brokenness. Financial gifts in these situations tend to do a lot more harm than good as they do not solve the underlying problem of poverty. In our attempt to bring about poverty alleviation, then, we need to strive to bring about reconciliation in all four relationship areas. This means that sharing the Gospel is key to being able to bring true transformation.

Part two of the book goes on to outline various strategies for helping the poor without infliction additional harm. It is essential to remember that development should be done with people and not for people. The importance of providing the right kind of help was then addressed, looking at examples where relief, restoration and development are appropriate and when they are not. An organisation should choose to focus on one of these areas to be the most effective.

Another principle discussed was to focus initially on what the community already has, rather than their needs. This helps a community to see their own strengths, rather than wallowing in their weaknesses. This can be done through Asset Mapping, Participatory Learning and Action or by an Appreciative Inquiry. In order to be the most beneficial to the community, the people themselves need to be involved in the development process from the planning stage, right through to the evaluation stage. In doing so, it is also imperative to give a voice to the marginalised and make sure that their input is also gained.

The third and final part of the book analysed practical strategies for helping without hurting. It first looked at the short term missions (STM) phenomenon. More often than not, STM go in, do something and leave feeling good about themselves. But the locals are often left in a much worse situation. There are many causes for the hurt that STM teams bring; the major reasons coming from the foreigner’s lack of understanding of the local’s culture, their concept of time and their concept of self. In order to be effective, STM need to come in through an existing ministry that is working long-term in the community and have a good understanding of the community’s needs and culture. STM teams need to seriously consider their reasons for taking a team, evaluate how the community is benefiting and ensure that the community actually want them there.

The book then went on to discuss the need for poverty alleviation methods in the United States itself which I have discussed in more detail in part C. After addressing what poverty looks like in the States, it outlined possible solutions that can be brought by the local church to the poor in their immediate surroundings. These can include workshops and classes on managing finances and training in the soft skills needed for successful employment. The final chapter then looked to the rest of the world and looked at ways in which different economic solutions can be implemented to bring about the material poverty alleviation required in a sustainable long-term fashion.

B - How can you apply these themes and principles to both your personal life and as a community development practitioner?

This book has been great because, while it has not taught me that many totally new things, it puts things that I have learnt in various different parts of life in one concise book. I am excited to take this book home and give it to the missions committee at my church to challenge the way that we do missions and propose some changes to our STM programs. I have learnt the importance of including the locals in every step of the development process and this is something that I want to make sure I implement in my personal life and in any development involvement.

I have previously been involved in helping communities out by doing practical things that I now realise they could have done for themselves. I now recognise how hurtful this can be and will endeavour never to do it again. Ensuring that the community themselves actually want us there, not just our group thinking we are needed, is also something that I will take into consideration in the future. Finally, this book has given me some new, insightful ideas for how to further develop my Masters in Computer Science work that I plan to do in 2013 with additional elements that will help bring about greater lasting change. I really enjoyed the book and I look forward to having the opportunity to put what I have learnt into practice.

C - Is there anything in this book that you have more questions about or disagree with?

I struggled the most with chapter 8 which addressed material ‘poverty’ in the United States. I put poverty in inverted commas on purpose, as I cannot agree with the authors that this is true material poverty. The authors described their monetary income, the amount of the welfare cheques they receive and their living conditions; all of which are better than most people in South Africa. I cannot believe that someone would be considered ‘below the poverty line’ while receiving $1200 from the government each month, the equivalent of nearly R10000; a reasonable starting salary for university graduates in South Africa. I understand that the cost of living can be higher in the United States in some respects, but I also think that the expected standard of living is extremely high. I cannot agree that these people need government or church funding, when they are already living better lives than the majority of the rest of the world, and thus I cannot consider them to be living in poverty. If you truly want to see poverty, you need to go and see how people live in the rest of the world. 

What a way to start 2012!

Right now I'm sitting on a couch in a little house in the outskirts of Oxford. What a week it has been! Paul and I have packing in so much sight seeing and touristy stuff that we are pretty much dead men walking now. I think we may have overdone it a bit, but it's lovely to spend some time with his extended family here in Oxford for a few days and slow down the pace a bit and 'recover' from the fast pace of London before we head off to the States. 

Hyde Park Swans

The church where my uncle
 Russell works as a vicar in Ewell

We landed at Heathrow on 30 December and spent a rather interesting day slowly making our way to Ewell, equipped with two big bags, one roll-a-board bag, two backpacks and a handbag. It was a little crazy, but we made it! We ended up stopping off at Hyde Park and meandering through the Winter Wonderland for a few hours. It was a little difficult with all our luggage, but well worth it! Food in London is rather pricey, so we ended up buying a loaf of bread and having a little picnic with a jar of Nutella I got for Christmas. :) 

The next day saw us waking up around midday, having caught up on some of the sleep we lost while travelling, and heading into London for our New Year's Eve adventures. We had organised to stay with a good friend of mine for the night, who is staying with her sister near St Paul's Cathedral for the holidays. It was such a blessing to have a place so close to the fireworks to crash for the night, because getting out of the center of London is nearly impossible with the crowds! After finally locating their place, we headed over to the fireworks viewing spots. We were about 6 hours early, but had been warned that it was necessary in order to get a good spot. So we had a little picnic, watched a movie, huddled together among thousands of other tourists under an umbrella and eventually watched a really incredible fireworks display. 

New Year's on Waterloo Bridge

Gabi, me and Tyrone

Catching up with Gabi later that night was wonderful, as I haven't seen her in two months and won't see her again for another six. We had some great girl-talk time and a good nights sleep before heading off to do some tyical touristy things the next day. Paul and I went to the Shakespeare Globe, the Tate Modern, the London Eye, St Paul's Cathedral, Big Ben and Westminster Abbey. By the late afternoon the rain was bucketing down, my boots were drenched through and it felt like I was squelching in puddles with every step! But it was well worth it and we got to tick off quite a few things off our list!

St Paul's Cathedral

Westminster Abbey

Big Ben

That evening we had a wonderful supper with my grandparents. It was really nice to see them again, share stories and catch up after not having seen them for about a year and a half. I'm so glad that Paul got to meet them too, as they immigrated to the UK soon after Paul and I started dating. It was also lots of fun realising how much I have in common with my aunt, Elaine, that I didn't know about: like being fussy about the different tastes of tap water and work better late at night than in the early morning! 

Granddad, Auntie Di, Elaine, Russell and me

On the 2nd one of Paul's dreams came true when we went to see the Emerite's Stadium; the home ground of his beloved Arsenal football/soccer team! Unfortunately we couldn't go inside the stadium, but just being there seemed to be enough :) We then headed to Hamleys and did some Oxford Street shopping. We also managed to squeeze in watching the changing of the guard at Buckingham Palace too! Fun times!

The next day was a little wet and there had been some terrible wind and rain the night before, resulting in a number of trees falling over railway tracks. Because of this, it took us quite a while to get into London, but we eventually got to see the Science Museum, Natural History Museum and explored Harrods a bit. We stopped off for some Starbucks and a little more Oxford Street shopping before heading home.

What I will look like when I'm old,
according to the Science Museum!

Paul outside the Natural History Musu

Then yesterday we packed up all our stuff and came with Paul's uncle, Ron, to Oxford. It's been so nice to slow the pace down a bit, put out feet up and just chill! I've really loved hearing more about Paul's family history and noticing all the similarities and quirks that mirror his family at home, even in a family that has grown up completely on the other side of the world! 

Today we went into Oxford for a few hours and just wandered the streets and stopped in at a few shops. I'm delighted with the 2 year anniversary present that Paul bought for me, and he also got himself a really nice warm Oxford University hoodie :)

We now have another 2 and a half days to go before we leave for the States (on Sunday)! YWAM Denver here we come! I'm so excited to be back and to have some awesome time growing with the Lord and spending time seeking him and worshiping him! 

2012 is definitely off to a good start and I know that there is a lot more of good stuff to come!